Unfortunately, the jukebox decided to move to a new song right then, so the decibel level of the bar had dropped considerably. I was too busy empowering the slut within to notice. Too bad for me no one else had been preoccupied with anything other than my screaming confirmation.
Everyone within shouting distance immediately started clapping and cheering. There were a few cat calls and wolf whistles and one over-zealous person who yelled, "Save a drum, bang a dirty slut!"
Drew got smacked in the arm by Jenny for that one.
Everyone felt so sorry for me that free drinks were sent to me for the next hour. And I couldn't be rude. I had to drink them. Which was why Carter was now helping me walk into my house because my feet just did not want to cooperate and – oh look, pizza!
I stumbled away from Carter and flipped open the cardboard box my dad left on the counter, shoveling an entire piece into my mouth.
"Mfmmff soooo f**king good," I mumbled around bites.
Carter stood behind me holding onto my hips to steady me while I inhaled two more pieces and guzzled two glasses of water.
"Fuck, this pizza is like…good and shit," I told him, wiping my greasy hands on a towel next to the box.
Alright, enough stalling. Time to do this shit.
I turned in Carter’s arms and gave him my best sultry look, chanting my mantra over and over.
I'm a dirty slut. I'm a dirty slut.
"Are you okay Claire? Do you have something in your eye?"
Carter cupped my cheeks and tilted my head back so he could look in my eye that did NOT have anything in it but sex appeal.
I am a drunk, dirty slut. I am a drunk, dirty slut.
I pulled my face away from his hands and decided to stick with a smile. It was safer.
I could do this; I could so totally do this.
I lifted the hem of my shirt up over my stomach, my black lace bra, and my head.
Except, my shirt got caught in the bobby pins on the top of my head. I was standing here in front of Carter with my shirt stuck around my head and chin and my arms stuck out in front of my face.
I am the great Cornholio. I am the great Cornholio. I need TP for my bunghole.
I started snorting and Carter bent his knees so he could peak into the opening of my shirt.
"Baby, what are you doing?" he asked with a laugh.
"I might need some help getting nuded," I said through snorts of laughter.
"Did you say neutered?"
Carter’s question just made me laugh even harder, which naturally made me cry – deep, heaving sobs with snot running down my nose.
Ladies and gentlemen, we have now entered the drunk crying portion of our evening. Please put your seatbacks in the upright position and try not to stare at the train wreck to your left.
Carter helped me get my shirt back on and put his hands back on my face, wiping away the tears with his thumbs.
"Hey, why the tears? What's wrong?" he asked softly.
That just made me cry harder. He was so nice and pretty and…nice. I sniffled loudly.
"I just wanted to be a slut so you'd like me and I don't want your penis to be disappointed and Twat Face is going to beat me up because I called her vagina a clown car."
Carter chuckled at my ramblings, bent down and scooped me up into his arms bridal-style. He walked down the hall towards my room, and I laid my head on his chest.
"First of all, I will never let Tasha beat you up, so don't even give that another thought," he reassured me as he gently set me down on my bed. He grabbed a couple of tissues from my nightstand and handed them to me as he knelt down next to my bed.
"Second," he said softly as I blew my nose and he held up the covers so I could crawl under. "You don't need to do anything to be dirty or sexy. You are already all of those things and more just by breathing. I am in a constant state of horniness whenever I'm near you or thinking about you. I don't want you to be nervous or worried about anything involving you and me and sex. You are everything I have ever wanted Claire. Never doubt that."
I really wish I wasn't drunk. I would so put his penis in my mouth right now.
Carter groaned and I was too drunk to care that I had just said that out loud. I snuggled into the covers.
"If you keep saying things like that, I am going break the rule I made to myself when I found you again," Carter said with a shake of his head as he pulled the covers up around my shoulders and smoothed my hair off of my cheek.
"What rule?" I whispered, unable to keep my eyes open any longer.
Carter leaned forward and put his lips by my ear.
"The rule that the next time I'm inside you, you will remember and enjoy every single second."
I wanted to tell him he was awfully cocky but that just made me think of c**k and wonder why male roosters were called cocks.
I passed out singing Alice in Chains "They come to snuff the rooster" lyrics.
16. They’re Called Nipples
Claire's body slid down the front of mine and she got to her knees, flicking the button of my jeans open as she went. The sound of my zipper sliding down filled the quiet room. I looked down at her on her knees and had to force myself not to grab onto her hair roughly and push her where I wanted her. Her soft, smooth hands reached into my pants and pulled my erection out, holding it right by her full lips. She glanced up at me through hooded eyes and smiled before she plunged her warm, wet mouth down on me. She swallowed the entire length and swirled her tongue around and around. She hallowed out her cheeks, sucking as hard as she could while she moved her mouth up and down. The tip touched the back of her throat with each suck in and caused me to moan loudly. Her hand pumped quickly up and down my length right below her mouth and I could feel my balls tighten with the force of my release. She ran her tongue from base to tip, swirling it around the head several times before pulling back and saying, "What's wrong with your wiener?"